I appreciate your openness & even were I to know you in person, I won't ever judge or condemn you.

I only want to add this. if you're driving, you don't go full speed all at once and all the time. I ask myself, where am I even speeding to?

What I'm saying is this, as sexual beings, thinking about sex is OK & part of our nature. But as in all things, you have to rein them in, just as a speeding driver must check his speed or hurt himself.

Both within & outside of marriage, it is possible to think pure about sex without "overspeeding."

Philippians 4:8-9
8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.
9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. (Holy Bible)